The online diary of a 27 year-old mother of one who is still trying to find out what she really wants to do with her life.

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Anyone? Anyone?

Dear internet,

If anyone bothers to read this site, could you please, please leave a comment? I'd really like to hear from you, and I'd like to know if anyone reads this nonsense.

I know that ideally this is supposed to be an outlet for me, an online diary of sorts. But let's be honest here, I want some attention.



Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Blah blah blah

I am so freakin' tired. And every night I think, okay I have to go to bed early, but I can't seem to get my ass in bed before 11. Already, I'm dreaming of days when I am no longer breastfeeding and can go away for a weekend with friends . . . . And all I will do is sleep.

Anyways, I cannot think of anything fun or witty to write about. At all.

Last night I went out with some girflfriends to reaffirm the fact that no, I cannot drink anymore because I become tipsy after like, say, 2 sips. As I was walking out of the restaurants revolving door, the one drink that I had made me diiizzzzzyyyyy.

Okay, I really am going to bed early tonight. Maybe.

Friday, January 20, 2006

I think I can I think I can . . . . The mighty voyage of front teeth.

So, The Little Prince has slept through the night since right before 3 months until now. And I'm dying. The first two bottom teeth? No big deal, we laughed in the face of those. The top six however that are trying to arrive at the same time - not so much. I mean, what the hell? How long does it take for those suckers to drop? I swear, this has been going on for months. "oh, oh, oh, they're almost out! Nevermind, they're not. Oh, here they come again!" and so on and so forth. Just come out already! Because I NEED SLEEP, and preferably more than a couple hours at a time. And if I wasn't already going to hell, I am now because let's just say that I am not the most pleasant person when woken up mere hours after falling into a deep slumber. Just ask my husband. He can be found signing me up for an anger management course.

Sunday, January 15, 2006

The mysterious, disappearing weekend

Weekends always go too fast. And, now that we have The Little Prince, I really treasure the days when our little family can spend whole days together rather than just a few hours when everyone is home for the evening. So why am I contemplating asking my work for a contract working every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday? Because I would make 3 times more money, that's why. And because then we would only have to pay the nanny for one day. Decisions, decisions. I don't know what to do.

Last night we went for dinner at a friends house. She has a real, adult home. Which sparked the ongoing discussion that Chouchou and I have about the 'burbs vs. the city. Somehow, regardless of the beauty of more than 2 bedrooms! a huge kitchen! a masterbedroom that we could fit our entire 2nd floor on! . . . the city always wins. Because I have to be able to walk places like to the store for more baby food (because no, regardless of the fact that I was very well intentioned, I do not make my own), the neighborhood coffee house (that makes the best chai tea latte - screw you starbucks, caribou coffee, and every other chain I've tried- although I must say that the little Mayorga coffee stand at my work makes a decent one), the park, and so on and so forth. So, we're still here.

Oh, and how could I forget to mention?! The Little Prince is 10 months tomorrow, and all weekend he has been taking steps by himself. I know, I know, complete genius.

He takes after his Papa.

Friday, January 13, 2006

The Little Prince and Chouchou - my boys

Monkey see, monkey do

I have not had time to update this site between working nights and sleeping.

Today though, I took The Little Prince to the zoo - and it was fun! Maybe I'm raising a vet, as he was all "yeeeeeeee!" everytime that he saw an animal. Including the armadillo.

Now that he's getting older, I just can't stop looking at this little boy and thinking, "God I love him." He is just the sweetest, friendliest guy. He can go days without crying. He waves and smiles at people on the street. He is perfect.

As for me, that's another story.

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

A letter to the mother&%$!@ who hit my car

warning: this post contains language that is inappropriate for those under 13 even though they probably talk like this all the time because hey, it's cool.

*note: I really do not curse all that much in real life (well, out loud). For no particular reason, I find myself inwardly cringing when I say the F word. After all, as my mom once told me, that is a word to use at work only.

Dear Motherfucker who dented my front left bumper and DID NOT LEAVE A NOTE,

FUCK YOU. I know that it would have been hard to leave a note, and maybe you can't even pay for the damages, but guess what? I don't give a shit because that is the polite, neighborly thing to do.

If I ever find out who you are and see you on the street, I will probably ignore you and then call my husband the second you're out of sight and demand "Why don't you do something?"

I hate you,


In other news, I am weaning my baby. At first, I was excited - he is 10 months old after all. But now, I feel slightly guilty, and hey if he's not getting any food from me, what good will I be? Will he even still need me? Do I want my boobs to go back to the size they once were? (answer: no). Yet, I feel that it is time to start this process so that he is cut off by 12 months which is when I originally said that I would quit. Also, no more pumping at work - yay!

And, that's about all I have for today. We are actually going out for an adult dinner tonight as it is restaurant week. Chouchou (you gotta love the man) suckered one of his friends into babysitting The Little Prince since he will be asleep the whole time.


Monday, January 09, 2006

Ummmmmmm . . .yeaahh

So, I have been feeling very blah lately, made even worse by the fact that I had a nanny today but absolutely nothing to do while she was here. I'm a nurse (in the NICU which is the neonatal intensive care unit), and if the census at my work is low, I get cancelled. For example, I was supposed to work last night, which of course I didn't want to and was secretly glad to get cancelled so that I could sleep, but at the same time feeling guilt over the fact that my paycheck will now suck unless I take a vacation day for last night. Shitty.

Just to give some background, I graduated with a degree in Psychology from the University of Wisconsin at Madison, and then worked in a couple of different psych hospitals before going back to school to become a nurse. It was a nursing as a second degree program, and so I got my bachelor's in less than a year which was cool. Then I took a job at a hospital in DC, and they placed me in the NICU. Only now, I'm trapped because I took money from them and in return owe them 2 years of employment. Which intially didn't sound too bad, but after a 4 month orientation that didn't count, a 4 month maternity leave, and now working part-time, I basically signed to pay them back with my life. Aside from that I like the job for the most part, and I can still be at work thinking how cool it is that while other people are sitting in front of their computers in a cube I am at an emergency delivery watching a baby being born.

Side Note: This entry is a compilation of completely random, useless information that I feel like writing about.

At my job, i just finished orienting a new grad. At the end of this long and tiring process, I got (or am getting) a bonus. I however, only work 2 days a week, so the 3rd day this orientee worked with another nurse. Now, you would think that the check would thus be split 2/3 to 1/3. Well, when I mentioned this the director said "well, I was thinking that you guys would split it since so and so really acted like the resource (!?) person and because it is your first time orienting." And now, this is so typically me: Smiles, "Oh, okay." And in my head: "the fuck?"

My next orientee starts in 2 weeks. UGH!

Also on my list of things to complain about is my body. Nevermind the fact that I weigh 6lbs less than when I got pregnant. This shit just ain't right. My stomach is a marshmallowy mess. (I'll eliminate the part about how I'm not doing a damn thing to change that fact besides just having ate chocolate chip cookie dough).

One other area of stress in my life right now is THE MOVE. My husband and I agreed that we would be moving to Chicago sometime this spring. Except that this move keeps getting pushed back, and back and back. We are moving to be closer to family, and basically because we just feel like it. The fact that we live in a neighborhood where I could walk out of my front door and buy crack may have something to do with it. Nevermind the fact that housing prices in this area are completely ridiculous and I refuse to be house poor and have to work only so that we can pay our mortgage as so many of our friends do. I will say in defense of my neighborhood that our actual neighbors are very sweet and nice, it is the outsiders who really fuck things up around here. Basically, about 5o percent of the houses on our block have been rehabbed (including ours), and so this area is in transition. Meaning, thank god we bought our house when we did so that we will make a shit load of money on it. Chicago, although also expensive, will at least allow us to live in a nice area where we can get more for our money. And, my sister lives there with my parents only 3 hours away.

And now . . .

The ABC's of me, which I am copying from (a very cool blog that I like to read).

I Am 27 years old.
Before I lived in DC, I lived in VA, before that WI
Chouchou means "cabbage" (in a nice way I guess). I used to call my husband that all the time, it is even inscribed in his wedding band.
I was once wrongly fired for failing a Drug test (And no you stupid bitch in Human Resources I had not recently been to the dentist and taken codeine. To my recollection at least. And I think I might remember that).
Ever since I moved out East, I have become less shy.
My husband is French, and his whole family still lives in France.
Someday, I would like to go to Greece.
I love to take looooong, Hot showers.
I used to Ice skate. Competitively. Sometimes when I can't sleep at night I fantasize that I am once again a teenage skater, only this time I am olympic material. In these fantasies I am known as "America's sweetheart."
Unfortunately, I cannot write just kidding about the above.
My name is Kristin.
I Love my family. I have 2 parents, a sister, a husband, and a 10 month old baby boy.
I have a sister who is 22, and she is named Megan.
I hate loud noises (fireworks, balloons popping - I just can't handle it).
Oprah's book club books? Love 'em all! And I'm not ashamed to admit it! (okay, maybe just a little).
My husband just finished eating a slice of apple pie that I bought for him at Trader Joe's.
I read books very quickly.
I used to run for exercise (well, sometimes). Now I don't do a godamn thing.
I really like the show Scrubs.
I was on the tennis team in high school.
That cookie dough that I just ate has left me really unsatisfied.
I am very loyal to my friends. And I love them as they are the best.
I got my eyebrows waxed this weekend.
x, y, and z. Obviously I am not a very creative writer who is getting tired of this whole boring list.


Friday, January 06, 2006

Obviously I have not figured out how to change the time on this thing because i am not going to bed at 5:32

Can't wait to sink into my clean sheets

There are few things that I appreciate more than clean sheets just put on my bed before going to sleep. Today I worked. All day. I have not even seen The Little Prince's face, and won't until morning. Am tired. Must sleep. Oh, but first did I mention that chouchou is an insomniac? So rather than snuggling into my nice clean, warm bed I must first watch a movie with him because we have some weird, though somewhat nice, unspoken rule that at night one cannot go upstairs without the other.

Night night.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Mission accomplished

So, I actually did get a lot done today. Call me crazy and OCD, but I have this thing where the house HAS to be IMMACULATE on the days that the nanny comes. Hey, I don't want her to think that we are anything but the coolest, cleanest parents.

Also, I've been keeping up on my new years resolution of increasing physical activity as I have been walking all over NE and SE running errands and whatnot. Today for example we hit Motophoto, CVS, Suntrust, and the park all in one shot. Oh, and please. Let's not forget The Family Dollar store conveniently located a block from my house.

The Family Dollar Store, a place where you can find a little of everything. AND, it even has a security guard to help you feel safe. Every time I'm in that place and waiting (and waiting) in line to check out, I watch the security guard. Because, he is not your average security guard who plants himself at the door. Oh no, he greets people, helps them find things, and is very helpful and friendly. I caught myself actually thinking that I should let his supervisor know what a nice person he is. Then I caught myself thinking "I am a dork."

Now, I am currently less than half watching "The Dukes of Hazard" which my dad sent me as a spoof Christmas gift because I. Was. Obsessed. With. This. Show. Once upon a time. "Just them good 'ole boys." I actually cried when my mom told me that in real life Bo was married (but then he thankfully divorced).

I can specifically remember this yellow nightie that I had that had Bo and Luke Duke on it (and underneath I of course wore my Daisy Duke underpants and completely unnecessary bra type thing that they made for 5 year olds). Then, i would dance around singing "Drinkin' whiskey from a dixie cup. . . ."

5 minutes into this movie I can already state the obvious. . .this is so not the real deal.

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

The Little Prince

Barf . . . and more barf

So, yesterday I spent the entire day either with my head in the toilet or lying on the floor. Which was made even more fun by the fact that I was home alone with a 9 month old.

"Sorry, mommy isn't feeling well, so please keep playing by yourself and don't get hurt or find something on the floor to choke on."

Luckily, I have the best baby on earth and he took very good care of me. And, we got through the day with him bumping his head only twice on the hardwood floor. Oops.

Why is it that when you have a baby your whole day can revolve around one simple thing? Like today, we had nap in the morning (well he was napping, I was cleaning) then went to gymboree, and now napping again (well, supposed to be but I hear some noises coming from the room down the hall). And I feel like it took all of my energy just to get that much done. Never mind the fact that our house looks like a storm blew threw since I haven't had a chance to do much with it in between holidays, in-laws, work and illness.

As usual I have a plan for getting a million things done this afternoon and evening, so hold onto your seats and dare to find out tomorrow what actually was accomplished.

Monday, January 02, 2006

mmmmm. . . .

NYC Xmas '05